Minahal ka nga ba?

Naramdaman mo ba nung kayo pang dalawa? Nakita mo ba sa kanyang mga mata? Tanging kayo lamang dalawa ang makasasagot ng katanungan kung minahal ka nga ba niyang talaga. Minsan may mga katanungan na alam natin ang kasagutan pero nagtatalo sa ating isipan kung ‘yon nga ba ang katotohanan. Sa mga panahong naging kayo sa tingin ko ay minahal ka rin n’ya Jac

Laging may dalawang side sa isang istorya. That person would not stay or at least care for you if walang love totally. Ang hirap sabihin kung sino ang may mali at kung minahal ka nga ba. Ikaw lamang ang tanging makasasagot niyan mula sa mga alaala na pinagsamahan ni’yong dalawa.

Hangga’t wala kayong maayos na closure; Hangga’t nasa stage ka pa kung saan  mayroon ka pang sama ng loob, magiging mahirap talaga ang bawat araw na darating.

Aminin man natin o hindi, mahirap magdesisyon, mahirap mag-move forward kung mayroon pang hindi malinaw sa’yo. Kung mayroon pang mga tanong na naghihintay ng mga kasagutan, mga bagay na sobrang labo at gusto mong malinawan.

Kung maaari, subukan mong makipag usap sa kanya hindi para makipagbalikan kundi upang malaman mo yung mga kasagutan sa mga tanong sa isipan mo. “The truth will set you free”, masakit ‘man minsan ang katotohanan pero ito yung daan para gumaan yung bigat na nadarama mo.

Mahirap maalis yung mga hindi magagandang alaala na dulot niya, mahirap mag move on. Pero try to get your self into engaging activities. Make your self busy. Never ever ever lock your self up on your room para magmukmok. Lumabas ka. Enjoy with your friends. Pagbutihin mo pang lalo yung mga bagay na ginagawa mo. 

Iba’t-iba tayo ng paraan para maka-move on. Iba-iba rin ang time frame ng tao sa pag m-move on. Merong nagagawa ito within 3 months (3 months rule) and some for a loooooong time. No one can dictate us on how and when we should move on. Mismong sarili lang natin ang makakagawa. With the help of others maybe and maybe not. Small steps lang. Sabi nga nila a little progress is still a progress. Kaya don’t pressure your self, mas lalo kang matatagalan. Kung ano mang nakasakit sa’yo wag mo ng balik-balikan pa. ‘Di mo kailangang magmadali, pero kailangan mong tanggapin na may mga bagay talaga na hindi para saatin, mga tao na kung minsan ay kailangan na nating palayain. Unti- unti lang at darating rin ‘yung time na masasabi mong:

Okay na ko, tanggap ko na. Napatawad na rin kita.

Sometimes may mga darating sa buhay natin na akala natin sila na yung para sa atin. We tend to confine ourselves sa pagmamahal sa maling tao kung kaya’t hindi na natin nabubuksan ang ating puso para sa mga tunay na  nagmamahal sa atin.

Palayain natin ang ating sarili mula sa kalungkutan, sama ng loob at mga katanungan. Alamin natin ang katotohanan, tanggapin; at darating ang oras na kaya na nating harapin nang may ngiti ang kinabukasan.

“Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act.” – Psalm 37:5

DISCLAIMERWe are not trained psychologists or licensed professionals. We’re just average folks who tries to listen with your story and give you  friendly advice. All the opinions written here are personal opinions of the authors and solely based on the limited data given to us.   

FRIENDZONED – SMP 2.0 Samahan ng mga Martir sa Pag-ibig

From codename “Friendzoned”

“May kaibigan ako for almost 2 years now, dahil sobrang close namin I fell for him, wala akong magagawa we’re in the same circle of friends eh. All I do is go with the flow. I know from the start na di siya magkakagusto saken kasi open siya ng konti saken, he shared his lovelife sa akin lang even if we have so many friends. I expected, yes. Wala eh we’re just partners in everything but I guess not in love. Mahal ko siya but I just can’t keep myself from falling in love with him even more although I know he loves someone else. Di ko nga alam kung sila na nung best friend niya eh. Pero lagi niyang sinasabi na sila. Best buds pa din naman kami ngayon. We still help each other in any way we can. I met new guys na naging kaclose ko but it’s still him I love. He’s definitely my first love. Martir ako sa kanya. I will do eveything for him. Di niya ako kayang mahalin and that’s okay. At least we’re friends pa din and I still love him. Di ko alam kung hanggang kelan but now, I just can’t let him go, not now. Di ko pa kayang magmove on.”

Some of us may already experienced to have a crush on a friend. Hindi lang sa friend na basta “friend” lang, kundi minsan sa sobrang close friend pa at kadalasan kayo pa yung palaging magkasama o magkatuwang sa bawat gawain. Hi Friendzoned! This is for you. 🙂

Well, sabi ng iba life is a matter of choice daw. God destined us for someone, but since we are created with freedom choice natin kung kanino tayo mai-inlove, kung doon ba sa nakasulat sa tadhana natin o sa iba… Choice rin natin if we will let ourselves continue to fall sa isang tao, maaaring hindi natin hawak na bigla nalang tayong mahulog sa kanya, pero may magagawa tayo to try na mapigilan yun.

Sabi nga sa isang movie line, “may mga babaeng gine-girlfriend at may mga babaeng hanggang kaibigan lang.” Same for the boys. May mga lalaking bino-boyfriend at merong mga hanggang kaibigan lang din. Minsan we were just influenced by some happenings na rin, like your friends “kantyaw“, and all those “pinagsamahan, memories and everything” kung kaya’t imbis na mapigilan ay lalo lang tayong nahuhulog.

Kaso hindi mo maiiwasan at darating at darating pa rin ang pagkakataon kung saan maiipit tayo sa pagitan ng “gusto ko siya” pero “ayokong masira yung pagkakaibigan namin”. Well good thing is choice rin natin if we will keep the friendship or move up the notch a little higher and be a living proof of those overrated friends-turn-to-lovers stories. So yes, hindi lahat ng magkaibigan na nagkainlovean at nagkaaminan ay nasira ang pagkakaibigan. Gayunpaman, marami rin ang mga magkaibigan, na nagka-inlovean at nag iwasan na ng tuluyan.

Some are ready to join the SMP o ang Samahan ng mga Martir sa Pag-ibig. Kaya nilang tiisin at kimkimin ang sakit ng one sided love. If you’ll ask why maybe the only answer is because they are happy. That person they love makes them happy and maybe they also find peace and they fell at ease when they are together. Their heart is happy whenever they are with that person. And please let’s not judge them. Iba-iba tayo ng source of happiness, kung minsan nga lang yung happiness na ‘yon ay may kalakip ding sakit.

But when will it be enough? Will it ever end? And bakit nga ba nagkaganon? It’s very different for every person. Because, some may have got the wrong signal/s. At dito nagsisimula ang tanong kung sino nga ba ang may kasalanan? Kung sino ang paasa? At kung sino ang mukang ewan dahil umasa? O dapat ba kasi ay hindi nalang masyadong naging caring at mabait? And the list goes on.

Sa sitwasyon mo kung saan sinasabi niya na may girlfriend na siya ay mahirap talaga, alam kong at the back of your mind inasam mo rin na sana maging kayong dalawa pero at “for now” mas pinili mo yung safer choice kung saan magpapatuloy yung pagkakaibigan ninyong dalawa.

Pero hanggang kailan? Kagaya ng sinabi mong, “I just can’t let him go, not now“.  Alam kong alam mo na in some point sa future ay darating yung time na kailangan mo nang mamili nang final answer kung sasabihin mo ba sa kanya at ipaglalaban yung pagmamahal mo o habang buhay mo na lamang na itatago kasama ng masasayang alaala ninyo yung nararamdaman mo para sa kanya. At hahayaang dalhin ng paglipas ng panahon ang pag-lipas din ng nararamdaman mo para sa kanya.

And again my friend, that is a choice you have to make. It’s tough. And it’s only you, yes you, who can rewrite the stars… joke. But jokes are half meant. Ikaw lang talaga ang makakapag-decide on what you want to do. Kahit anong sabihin ng mga taong nasa paligid mo, ikaw pa rin ang may hawak ng magiging desisyon mo.

Regarding sa pag momove on, mahirap talaga, at hindi yung label kung naging “kayo ba” ang nagpapahirap dun, kundi yung fact na hanggang doon na lang talaga kayo; yung fact na magiging alaala na lang pagtagal yung mga pinagsamahan ninyo noon.

Well mahirap pero maaaring mabawasan. Try to focus yourself sa ibang mga bagay, kung nagaaral ka pa ngayon subukan mong ituon pang lalo yung oras mo sa pagaaral o pagpapabuti sa kung ano mang ginagawa mo; try to change yung nakasanayan mo, unti-unti subukan mong bawasan pansamantala kahit kaunti yung mga bagay na nag uugnay sa inyong dalawa. Magiging mahirap lalo na kung halos araw-araw kayong nagkikita at nagkakasama, pero maaari etong maging way para “maka-move on” ka na; lastly tanggapin mo sa sarili mo na wala siyang feelings para sayo, masakit pero kapag tunay mo nang natanggap sa iyong puso ay unti-unti na ring magsusubside ang feelings mo para sa kanya. Two in one, nabawasan o nawala yung feelings mo para sa kanya and at the same time  hindi siya nawala sayo bilang kaibigan mo.

Bata ka pa, marami pang mangyayari. May mga tao pang darating sa buhay mo, at mayroon din namang mga aalis. No one knows what will happen tomorrow, pero naniniwala ako “that your future is somehow connected sa naging desisyon mo ngayon“. Believe it or not, mayroon pang mas na mga challenges pa ang darating, mapa-love life at sa buhay mo mismo.

Dalawa lang din yan, maybe hindi talaga kayo ang para isa’t-isa o hindi lang ito ang tamang oras para sa inyong dalawa. 

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. “1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ESV 

DISCLAIMERWe are not trained psychologists or licensed professionals. We’re just average folks who tries to listen with your story and give you  friendly advice. All the opinions written here are personal opinions of the authors and solely based on the limited data given to us.   

Welcome to The Pinoy Wall

What is The Pinoy Wall?

The Pinoy Wall (TPW) is like a “payong kaibigan” blog wherein you may send your stories about love, problems, and other things you want to share with us and we will try to give you some advices that you could consider to at least lessen the worries you have.

We will also showcase here our Filipino culture, traits and all the other Pinoy characteristics and trends that will surely be relatable for you.

What is the story behind TPW?

Read more…

Welcome to The Pinoy Wall!

What is The Pinoy Wall?

The Pinoy Wall (TPW) is like a “payong kaibigan” blog wherein you may send your stories about love, problems, and other things you want to share with us and we will try to give you some advices that you could consider to at least lessen the worries you have.

We will also showcase here our Filipino culture, traits and all the other Pinoy characteristics and trends that will surely be relatable for you.

What is the story behind TPW?

We decided to start this blog because we want to help other people by being a friend to them that will listen to their stories and will try to give good advices.

Just like other people we’ve experienced several struggles and challenges in life. The learning from those trials helped us to become a stronger person today.

We might not guarantee to give you the advices you want, but rest assured that we will try to give you the best we could give based on our experiences.

Share us your story

DISCLAIMER: All advises given are from the moderator’s own point of view and solely based on the available details given to them by the sender.

The Pinoy Wall